40+ Funny Quotes for Cremation Urns

There is a certain type of person who will always be remembered with a smile and a laugh. Their sense of humor, joy, and wit require a cremation urn with a funny quote or saying on it.

With this “special” someone in mind, here are more than forty funny quotes for cremation urns or headstones to inspire you with the perfectly dry and darkly humorous epitaph for your loved one.

Use these quotes on an urn, or just take a minute to enjoy a break from the seriousness of life and give you a chuckle. Read on!

Funny Quotes for Your Epitaph

A. First person quotes

Don’t make me come out there!

I have nothing further to say.

Urn jokes: Let me out

Joke’s over… let me out NOW!

Wife, Friend, Love, Psycho

Dang it’s dark in here

I knew this would happen

Are you happy now?

I made some good deals
And I made some bad ones.
I really went in the hole with this one.

Now I know something you don’t!

I told you I was sick

Reincarnating… I’ll be right back

I’ll be back


Don't laugh

Don’t laugh… you’re next

I came here without being consulted
And I leave without my consent

I’d rather be shopping

I’d rather be hunting

Gone Fishing

Follow me at your own risk

It was fun while it lasted

I’ve achieved Step One to becoming a zombie

2. Second person quotes

You have a whole eternity to think inside the box

Are you happy now?

Quotes for Urns


It does my heart a world of good
To see you in a box of wood

You’ve achieved Step One to becoming a zombie

You have reached your final destination

D. Third person quotes

The shell is here but the nut is gone.

Here rests [name], second-fastest draw in [city or state]

funny urn quotes for him

He Loved Bacon.
Oh, and his wife and kids too.

Another One Bites the Dust

He had some faults and many merits
He died of drinking ardent spirits

On the 22nd of June
[Name] went out of tune


Raised Four Beautiful Daughters
With Only One Bathroom
Still There Was Love


Game Over

Died From Not Forwarding That Email To Ten People

Factory Reject

Return to Sender

shopped till she dropped

Shopped Till She Dropped

She lived each day as if it were her last… especially this one

Laid to rest
No mouring please
At his request

He lived, he loved, he laughed, he left.

Bonus: If your last text message went on your headstone, what would it say?

Not too long ago the Twitterverse had some fun with this question: If your last text message went on your headstone, what would it say?

The question appears to be first pondered by comic artist Dan McDaid, who tweeted:

He immediately responded to his own tweet: Mine is “…I’ll be up shortly”, which is optimistic to say the least

Fans quickly responded with macabre glee, and the trend spread. Here are some of the best from thousands of responses.

BTW, mine was (and I seriously did not plan this)… “Looking forward to when you guys come visit!!”


More: Funny Tweets Like This

If looks could kill

Zoom zoom



Live and learn

Do they serve cookies there?

So that’s why you won’t call me back

Wait, how did it get there?

Holding a grudge

What I wouldn’t give for a good salad

It’s a one-way ticket

Unsure about the menu here

Stay a while

A for Effort


Not your first time visiting…

r u there?

Love me that pizza

Change of plans

Double bonus: There’s a Home Alone 2 reference in this post.

Do you have any more funny quotes for cremation urns to add to our collection? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.

3 thoughts on “40+ Funny Quotes for Cremation Urns”

  1. Great work.
    Your quotes are funny, inspirational quotes help people who are stressed, bored and people loosing hopes . I read lots of funny blogs and posts everyday.

  2. I thought of a few inscriptions as i was looking through the ones here:

    -I’ll see/meet you on the other side
    -I kicked the bucket
    -Use caution. The bucket is not just a list
    -I kicked a bucket to see what would happen.

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